/ seinfeld-japan-1 · 11 months ago·

Here is a possible Seinfeld style scene where the characters talk about Japanese culture in 2023:


JERRY, GEORGE and ELAINE are sitting at a booth. KRAMER slides into the seat next to Jerry.

KRAMER: Hey, hey, hey! Guess who just got back from Japan?

JERRY: You went to Japan?

KRAMER: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was there for two weeks. It was amazing.

ELAINE: What did you do there?

KRAMER: Oh, you know, I did everything. I saw the cherry blossoms, I ate sushi, I rode the bullet train, I visited a temple...

GEORGE: Did you see any sumo wrestlers?

KRAMER: Sumo wrestlers? Of course I saw sumo wrestlers. They're everywhere.

GEORGE: Really?

KRAMER: Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're like celebrities over there. They have their own TV shows, magazines, video games...

ELAINE: Video games?

KRAMER: Yeah, yeah, yeah. They have this one game where you can play as your favorite sumo wrestler and fight against other sumos in different arenas.

ELAINE: Arenas?

KRAMER: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like a volcano, a waterfall, a spaceship...

JERRY: A spaceship?

KRAMER: Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's very futuristic.

JERRY: And you played this game?

KRAMER: Oh yeah. I played it all day and all night. I was addicted.

JERRY: And how did you do?

KRAMER: Well...let's just say that I'm not very good at it.

JERRY: Why not?

KRAMER: Because it's impossible to win!

JERRY: Impossible to win? How can that be?

KRAMER: Because they have this thing called "the honor system".

JERRY (confused): The honor system?

ELAINE (also confused): The honor system?

KRAMER: The honor system is a feature of the sumo video game that requires you to admit defeat when you lose.

GEORGE: Admit defeat? What do you mean?

KRAMER: Well, you see, when you play the game, you have to wear this special headset that connects to the console. And when your sumo gets knocked out of the ring or falls down, you have to say "I lost" into the microphone.

GEORGE: You have to say "I lost"?

KRAMER: Yeah, yeah, yeah. You have to say it loud and clear. And if you don't say it within five seconds, the game shuts off and you lose all your progress.

GEORGE: That's insane!

ELAINE: Why would anyone do that?

KRAMER: Because it's part of their culture. They respect the spirit of sumo. They value honesty and integrity. They don't cheat or lie.

JERRY: But what if you don't want to admit defeat? What if you want to keep playing?

KRAMER: Well're out of luck.